I’m thinking of starting a nudist colony in my own home…

SERIOUSLY!! Wouldn’t it be cool to come to my house and see me naked everyday??

Ok, now that you’re done laughing (or vomiting) here’s my problem… STATIC FUCKING CLING!! Does anyone have a sure fire way to defeat this annoying little jerk?? I’m so tired of taking clothes out of the dryer and hearing them crackle because there loaded with enough static electricity to power a small African Village. Not to mention how many times I’ve reached into the dryer and gotten shocked!! Just today I was folding a load of clothes as they came out of the dryer and I must have gotten shocked at least 40 fucking times!! Metal dryer + static electricity = one seriously pissed off mommy!

I use dryer sheets. Don’t know why… Just mimicking what my mom does (it doesn’t help that at 31, married with 2 kids and still living with my parents so I use what they buy. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not a moocher! I pay rent and stuff, they buy the groceries, we’ve got it all worked out.). So I’m thinking of trying liquid fabric softener and see if that helps. Anyone have any ideas?

I’m also tired of seeing my little baby girl with her beautiful blond hair (where the fuck did the blond hair come from?? I’m a brunette.) sticking straight out after she takes off her hat. That’s why I don’t wear hats in the winter time., cause the same thing used to happen to me, I’d take my hat off and I’d look like I’d stuck my finger in a electrical outlet! (On a side note, when I was little I DID stick my finger in an electrical outlet once or twice when my mom wasn’t looking. I do NOT recommend anyone try THAT at home. Explains a lot, huh?? Der!)

Well, I needed to rant so there you have it. Enjoy! Hope you had a nice laugh and nothing was too shocking… (GET IT?? Shocking?? HAHAHAHA!! I crack me up!!)

Ya know, now that I’m thinking about it, maybe a nudist colony in my house wouldn’t be such a good idea…

Later taters!

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Categories: FAIL, this shit can only happen to me! | Tags: , , | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “I’m thinking of starting a nudist colony in my own home…

  1. bridget

    one of the best ways to reduce static in the home is to get a humidifier. the static is caused because the air is so dry outside and inside. also a spray on conditioner can help with the hair stuff.

  2. I agree with your first thought. Throw out the clothes and go naked. You’ll be healthier for it and you won’t have to worry about static cling.

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