To work or not to work, that is the question??

I’ve been a stay at home mom for seven years.  (Unless you count the three years I spent running my husband’s pet store with my toddler son at my side. AND the four years I’ve been selling Tastefully Simple.)  I’ve often wondered how things would be different if I’d had a career, something that would put that Bachelor’s Degree in Creative Writing to work instead of just being a pretty piece of paper on my wall.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love being home with my kids.  I love that we are fortunate enough that I don’t HAVE to get a job.  I love that I get to be there for every moment, every milestone, but most of my friends work outside the home and I often look at them with longing…

I wonder if I’m missing something.  The camaraderie, the atmosphere, the ADULT conversations.  There’d be no Dora, Diego, Backyardigans, or Yo Gabba Gabba (or less of them at least).  There’d be no potty training, baby talk, class trips, or daytime lunches with my best friend(or less of them too).

I wouldn’t be expected to come to EVERY presentation and parade at school. ( I DO go to EVERY presentation and parade at school because that’s how I roll.)  I wouldn’t feel bad because I’m a member of the PTA but don’t do anything with/for them.  (I do feel bad…  I’m not going to do anything about it, but I feel bad.)  I wouldn’t feel guilty about not going on EVERY field trip on those stupid ginormous  yellow school buses that have awful shocks. ( I made the mistake once to ride in the very back with my son and his classmates while I was about 7 months pregnant with my daughter.  Let’s just say that I’m lucky I didn’t give birth right there in the back of the bus.)

BUT I would have to have my kids in some sort of child care.  Someone else would be there for my kids during the day for little milestones like when my daughter goes potty all by herself, or my son gets 100% on his grammar test.    Someone else would sit with my son as he does his reading homework, someone else would have to sing my daughter to sleep during nap time.

HOWEVER, millions of women kiss their families goodbye and go to work every day (including some of my closest friends).

They do it because they have to.

They do it because they want to.

And they’re still there for most of it.

They’re still there for little things like parades and presentations.  They still come home and cook dinner for their family.  They still manage impeccable households, complete with laundry, pets, and soccer games.  They still get the things done around the house that take me all week to get done.  And they still get up every morning and do it all over again.  Some of them even consider going to work their break from the insanity that is their home life!

Back when my husband’s business was coming to a close, we had “the talk”.  The store was closing, should I get a job and look for child care for our then four year old son?  We both agreed that my job would only be paying for the child care we found for him.  We decided I would stay home until he went to school.

Enter baby #2. 

So I’m home for another three years.  Hopefully by the time my daughter goes to school, I’ll have this blogging thing down and I won’t HAVE to get a job outside of my home.  Either that or we’ll win the lotto and then we can BOTH stay home.

I’d better dust off my resume!!  🙂

This post was written as part of the Silicon Valley Moms Group Book Club.  It was inspired by the book Just Let Me Lie Down: Necessary Terms for the Half Insane Working Mom by Kristin Van Ogtrop which I received free from the publisher for the purpose of this book club discussion.

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Categories: Book Club, SV Mom's Group, Uncategorized | 3 Comments

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3 thoughts on “To work or not to work, that is the question??

  1. This is such a difficult decision! I go back and forth with it all the time. Often I wonder if my husband would be better at staying home with the kiddos and have me working. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to be brave enough to take that leap. But at least for the next few years I plan on doing just the same thing as you…stay my behind home and play with my kiddos. All while trying to figure out this blogging thing! Great post!

    • I feel your pain!! There’s no way I’d be able to make enough money to support the household on my own with my little BA in English, so there’s no way hubby would be able to stay home and I go to work. But I could get something to contribute to what’s already coming in… Not till little miss goes to school tho. Thanks for reading!

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