This month, the From Left to Write Book Club is reading Saturday Night Widows: The Adventures of Six Friends Remaking Their Lives by Becky Aikman. It’s about a group of women, all in different stages of widowhood, getting together and forming their own support group of sorts. It was an effort by Becky to prove to herself and others that being a widow didn’t mean you had to sit around and mourn your lost husband forever. It was meant to prove that one could be a widow and still move on and create a new life.
As you know, the From Left to Write Book Club doesn’t write reviews on the books we read. We write posts inspired by the book. Last night, I was trying to put together ideas on what to write for this book. Nothing came to mind. I read posts by other members. Most of them were about the death or impending death of a loved one. I’m not feeling writing about the death or impending death of anyone. I’ve been there and done that. I want, like Becky wanted from the widows group she was kicked out of, a more uplifting post. Something that talks about life after death instead of grieving.
So, lets face it, it’s pretty inevitable that we’re all going to die at some point, right? (Unless you’re my dad who says he’s not going to die cause he’s got entirely too many people to annoy still.) But what about the people you leave behind after you die? What kind of things will they remember of you after you’re gone? This is what I want to write about for you today.
A few days ago, the kids and I were in the middle of our usual morning routine. Little Miss was at the table eating breakfast, I was packing Big Boy’s lunch, and Big Boy was off somewhere on his iPod.
Now, the day before, My Big Boy wasn’t feeling well and wound up giving back his breakfast after only eating it a half hour before. Ick. So he stayed home from school. Now I had a meeting that night and wouldn’t you know it, he spikes a fever. Dang it! So I pop him some Advil, and go to my meeting.
Next morning, he gets up, gets dressed, goes into the kitchen for breakfast. I didn’t say anything, he just did it.
I made the mistake of mentioning that since he had a fever the night before that I wasn’t planning on sending him to school. (I KNOW, I know… the rule is 24 hours fever free, but c’mon, he was FINE!) Well, as soon as he heard that I was originally wasn’t going to send him to school, he started.
“I HATE SCHOOL!! ”
“IT’S TOO HARD!!”
“I don’t wanna go!!”
So this is my fault, I know, so how do I handle this?? I scream at him. I argue with him. He cries… I hang my head, defeated, he hides in his room.
Then, a miracle occurred! MY HUSBAND WALKED IN THE DOOR!!
“Oh, I’m SO glad you’re home!”
“Would you please go down there and talk to your son? He’s refusing to go to school.”
“But I thought you weren’t sending…”
“I know, but he got himself up, and dressed, and he had breakfast. He’s FINE.”
Husband goes into boy’s room.
I brace myself for impact.
Now, I get told that I yell, a lot. But when my husband is angry or the kids aren’t cooperating and he’s frustrated, he explodes.
Five minutes go by and I don’t have a crying boy in front of me yet. I need to investigate.
So I go into the boy’s room, and my husband is kneeling in the middle of the room talking to the boy. TALKING!! Not yelling.
And the words?? Oh the words!
“I need you to go to school and learn as much as you can. Show everybody up. Be smarter than everybody. Make me proud.”
That’s the memory I want my son to have years down the road. The memory of his father giving him the motivation he needed when he couldn’t go on. The memory of his father talking to him, being there for him, supporting him, when his world was crashing down.
Thanks babe. You did it. I love you.
This is an original ROSCMM post and was written for the From Left to Write Book Club. This post was inspired by Saturday Night Widows: The Adventures of Six Friends Remaking Their Lives by Becky Aikman a copy of which I received for free for the purposes of this book club. All opinions are that of Jennifer herself, and no, you can’t steal my content. It’s called Copyright, yo.
Copyright 2013. Mastermind Mommy